Letters

Beating the bullies and lawlessness

Posted 11/27/15

Editor’s Note: A resident of Shalom Apartments, Patricia Mitola grew up in the Midwest, receiving her undergraduate degree in health and physical education from Illinois State University and her …

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Letters

Beating the bullies and lawlessness

Posted

Editor’s Note: A resident of Shalom Apartments, Patricia Mitola grew up in the Midwest, receiving her undergraduate degree in health and physical education from Illinois State University and her Master’s in Special Education from the University of Minnesota. She has published four educational texts for those with special needs, including the instruction of cursive.

She taught 4th and 5th grade in Minnesota before moving to Rhode Island in the late ’70s and taught for a little more than two years at the Groden Center in Coventry and then a couple of years at a training school before moving to Pennsylvania.

She retired officially in 2002 and moved back to Rhode Island three years ago. This letter to the editor is an edited and shorter version of Mitola’s submission.

To the Editor:

Social disorder: lawlessness, destructive protests, beatings, extreme violence, and now murders of our police. Initially, bullying was a problem, then protests, and presently, it has grown to all kinds of disrespect for the law. It has to stop NOW, before it becomes unmanageable – if we are not there already. Obviously, the growing levels of violence are fallout from failure in handling the problem.

The problem has become worse because we are not doing what is necessary to solve the problem. Following the rules, doing what is right, respect for authority – all are learned behaviors.

Since before the ’50s we have had psychologists and philosophers telling parents we must not say “no’’ to our children. Fifty years later, we see the product of “self-pleasing” discipline. Bad behavior has been rewarded generation after generation and we have a very self-centered society that wants to do things their own way. We also have children with suicide problems, addictions, mental problems, and negative self-images.

This can only be corrected by returning to the belief and practice of respect and obedience to authority, rule of law and justice as the abiding guide for home and society.

We have developed a mentality that is opposed to correction, and traded it for appeasing, begging, bribing or buying correct behavior or self control.

Learning comes from experiencing distasteful consequences for not complying with the law.

We have created children who have grown up and become parents who do not have the mindset of a disciplined past culture and do not know how to require obedience. Personal responsibility is gone. 

All persons in role of authority must have purpose and direction for a positive end. They must set AND enforce standards for living. The desired respect for authority, law, justice and order must consistently be applied and expected – beginning in the home, on the job and socially.

Negative behavior will become extinct when responses to those behaviors consistently become unacceptable. To say it simply, when a person misbehaves and immediately is corrected or punished, he learns that he must not do that again unless he wants to experience the consequences.

It is learned visually, auditorially, physically, and emotionally. Verbal correction, as well as visual examples can be successful to warn or remind, or correct. The earlier in life the training and expectations begin, the easier it is to learn desired behaviors.

We have been taught to believe that punishment or directions are mean, so serious disciplinary action will need to be sold strongly to our public. We will need to start at two separate levels – one at the unlawful, destructive murdering level and the other in our homes, as young as possible.  

Our law officers must be trustworthy, supported, protected and taught as needed to enforce consequences for all unlawful actions. We must use stronger consequences with support from the court systems. Punishments must be meaningful and enforced to get the present society into a corrected mental understanding of what is lawful and what is not. Discipline, correction, punishment are not bad, mean or wrong, but a means to build a pleasant and safe environment.

The easiest point in time to address these problems is at the very beginning of life before the wrong patterns are developed.

At all levels in the home, school, work, everywhere – let’s start today to rebuild respect for authority, law and order. Seek help if you need it – it is available. We can beat the bully and unlawful mindset if we do what we must for a brighter safer tomorrow.

Patricia Mitola

Warwick

Comments

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  • Justanidiot

    The moral of the story is: shut up, sit down, do what you are told, and listen to the man.

    Just like our founding fathers did back when they decided the king was correct and we should remain his loyal subjects.

    Remember to say God Bless the Queen when you get pulled over for driving while black.

    Friday, November 27, 2015 Report this

  • wwkvoter

    she forgot her key words!

    obedience, correction, discipline, distasteful consequences, punishment,

    If we beat the bully into not bullying, we'll have Heaven on Earth... Praise All Authority! Punishment until all is good!

    This is S.C.A.R.Y. but the silver lining is... she is retired!

    Tuesday, December 1, 2015 Report this

  • richardcorrente

    Dear Justanidiot and Taxpayer,

    Patricia Mitola is an elderly lady living in Shalom where my mother-in-law also lives.

    She speaks about "beating the bullies".

    Don't be one of them.

    Thank you.

    Merry Christmas to all.

    Richard Corrente

    Democrat for Mayor - 2016

    Wednesday, December 2, 2015 Report this

  • Justanidiot

    Mr Mayor,

    I only the people who bully me.

    She started it.

    Thursday, December 3, 2015 Report this

  • RISchadenfreude

    Wow, Justanidiot, you must be easily intimidated if an elderly woman can bully you. As far as DWB goes, the problem isn't "profiling", it's "stereotyping"- that's when you drive through a neighborhood with your windows down, blasting the stereo, the smell of marijuana and cigar smoke emanating from the vehicle which is uninspected, unregistered and/or uninsured, and when you get pulled over, cited and towed, you claim the officer is racist. Accusations of profiling are more often than not a tool of community organizers to cow law enforcement into backing down from doing their job.

    Things have gone so far to the left that the pendulum needs to swing back the other way; I don't know about anyone else, but I'm tired of hearing that bad behavior is society's fault, crimes are the result of a bad childhood or someone else's provocation, and that guns or some other inanimate object cause crime. The statistics show that social engineering solutions aren't working and that the problems have just gotten worse when people can blame everyone but themselves for their problems and actions.

    Time (again) to grow up- no one said it would be easy, but that's what today's social solutions are doing.

    Thanks, Mr. Corrente, and Merry Christmas to everyone who isn't offended by a denominational holiday greeting of good will.

    Wednesday, December 9, 2015 Report this

  • Justanidiot

    We are too far to the left?

    Tell that to the Gestapo police out there.

    I guess the beatings will continue until morale improves.

    Wednesday, December 9, 2015 Report this

  • RISchadenfreude

    Justanidiot, "Gestapo police"? Are you talking about Warwick, or police officers in general? I hope you're not painting every law enforcement officer with the same brush; that would be like thinking every commenter on the Beacon is a nitwit based solely on your comments.

    Not every bad apple gets weeded out during the induction process, no matter what the occupation- just ask anyone that's hired applicants or supervised other people, however, I do believe more can be done with periodic stress assessments. Many law enforcement supervisors are overwhelmed with their own job responsibilities and either don't notice or aren't trained to identify when an officer needs some mandatory downtime or "mental hygiene", and some departments don't have comprehensive policies to identify these individuals.

    If you saw or heard half the ignorant nonsense that comes out of the "frequent flyers" and self-entitled folks that the police have to deal with on a daily basis, you'd be amazed.

    Based on your comments, you appear to be a pretty reactionary, intolerant and thin-skinned individual- just glad you don't have the responsibility behind a badge.

    Friday, December 11, 2015 Report this