Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters


(Adult fairy tale)

The question is, which witches are they hunting?
There are black witches and white witches in this dark adult fairy tale, which opens with the original telling of Hansel and Gretel's father taking them deep into the forest to avoid the witches, only to have them kill a witch in the gingerbread house.
The siblings are all grown up now and have dedicated their lives to protecting children by killing witches. They have weapons of mass destruction and are able to survive continuous beatings by the black witches. The only drawback is that poor Hansel has developed diabetes from eating all that gingerbread.
Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton are convincing as the witch hunters, although at times the writers ask them to do some pretty ridiculous things. Eventually they save all the kidnapped children from a horrible fate.
Hansel saves a redheaded woman (Pihla Vitala) from a sinister sheriff who wants to burn her as a witch. She turns out to be a white witch who joins their crusade, along with their biggest fan (Thomas Mann).
My favorite character was Edward, a huge, ugly ogre who saves Gretel and changes allegiances and joins the crew for future battles and, heaven forbid, a sequel.
The 3D is pretty good, with a variety of missiles coming out after you.
Rated R, with violence, profanity and nudity


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